The Delphi Bureau

Glenn Garth Gregory is a reluctant spy.

Laurence Luckinbill.

He believes he was hired to do research for a government agency called the Delphi Bureau. Of course, the bureau has no street address and possibly no other employees. Glenn (Laurence Luckinbill) receives his assignments from Washington, D.C. socialite Sybil Van Loween (Celeste Holm). Unlike the men from U.N.C.L.E. and even Maxwell Smart, Glenn doesn't carry a weapon of any sort. He relies on his photographic memory--which he employs in McGyver-like fashion to get out of tight spots.

Cameron Mitchell as a baddie.

In the 1972 pilot film, the theft of surplus government jets sends Glenn to the small town of Lotus, Kansas, to investigate Buttercup Farms. Glenn suspects that the farm's owner, a former arms dealer, is using a feed-the-hungry program as a cover for the illegal sales. It's not long before the Delphi Bureau agent gets framed for murder and chased through cornfields by Cameron Mitchell on a tractor. Yes, there's a little bit of North By Northwest in The Delphi Bureau--just no Hitch and no Cary Grant.

The Delphi Bureau is a watchable made-for-TV adventure that relies heavily on Laurence Luckinbill’s charms and its supporting cast of familiar faces. Fortunately, those are two good reasons to view it. While never achieving major stardom, Luckinbill forged a moderately successful acting career on stage (the original Boys in the Band), film (playing Spock’s half-brother in Star Trek: The Final Frontier), and television. He has been married to Lucie Arnaz since 1980.

Dub Taylor as a farmer.

The supporting cast features Bradford Dillman (one of TV's busiest actors in the 1970s), Cameron Mitchell (Buck on The High Chaparral), and Bob Crane. Dean Jagger and Dub Taylor, who appeared together in the 1961 Troy Donahue soap Parrish, have small roles. Taylor has a delightful cameo as an applejack-drinking farmer who picks up Gregory while the latter is trying to elude a posse.

The female lead is Joanna Pettet, another TV veteran, whom I have always found a bit lacking in warmth. Her cool demeanor is used well in The Delphi Bureau as it prevented me from ascertaining if she was duplicitous or not until the closing scenes.

Joanna Pettet.

Pettet led an interesting life offscreen. She visited her close friend Sharon Tate on the day of Tate's murder. Pettet was married to Alex Cord for 21 years; their adult son died of a drug overdose. She and British actor Alan Bates became close friends in the mid-1960s and lived together as companions during the last years of his life.

As for The Delphi Bureau, it spawned a 1972-73 television series which became one of the three rotating elements of The Men (what an awful title!). The other two series were Assignment Vienna with Robert Conrad and Jigsaw starring James Wainwright. Celeste Holm, who was used sparingly in The Delphi Bureau pilot, did not appear in the series.

Champagne for Caesar: Bubbling Over With Fun!

I don’t know what it is about bubbles but I like them. Glinda used a large bubble to transport herself in The Wizard of Oz. Doris Day sold Happy Soap in The Thrill of It All, which included a scene with a bubble-filled pool into which an unhappy James Garner drives his car. In Champagne for Caesar, bubbles are used on the set of the TV quiz show "Masquerade for Money” and fittingly call to mind the show’s sponsor, Milady Soap, which is advertised as “the soap that sanctifies.” But, bubbles are also reminiscent of champagne, so their use has a double meaning.

Champagne for Caesar is a fun, lesser-known film, in which neither champagne nor Caesar plays a critical role in the story. The latter is actually a parrot with some bad habits taught to him by college students. The former is one of the preferred habits of said bird.

The movie focuses on Beauregard Bottomley, a genius who has trouble finding work and shares a small bungalow with his sister Gwenn and the parrot. Beauregard is delightfully played by the versatile, silver-tongued Ronald Colman. The siblings observe a TV show aired on a small television in a store window around which a number of other people have gathered. The program is called “Masquerade for Money” where contestants dress up as a character about whom the host, Happy Hogan, then asks questions.

The following day, Beauregard is sent on a job interview to the Milady Soap Company. This company features a room with arms that hold various items, and reminded me a bit of La Belle et La Bete. Beauregard is introduced to the unforgettable company owner, Burnbridge Waters, who calls him a “dreamer,” doesn’t like his humor, and does not hire him.

Beauregard comes up with an idea. He knows that “Masquerade for Money” is sponsored by the Milady Soap Company and he figures the worth of the company to be approximately $40 million. He dresses as the Encyclopedia Brittanica and appears on the show. He welcomes any and all questions and answers them accurately and, often quite humorously, as well. Each time an answer is correct the amount won doubles. He then refuses to take the money and insists on coming back each week. Everyone loves him and the sales of Milady Soap soar. But then reality sets in: what if Beauregard never makes an error?

Milady Soap needs a secret weapon and they find one, in the beautiful and intellectual Flame O’Neill, who is presented to Beauregard as a gift from the Beauregard Bottomley Billings Montana Fan Club when he is sick with a cold. Flame arrives dressed as a saintly nurse and relieves neighbor Frosty (aren’t the names a hoot?) of her charge.

The story line is often predictable, but it is quite fun to see everything play out because of the talented, eclectic, and capable cast.

Vincent Price gives one of his best comedic performances as Burnbridge Waters, a character who occasionally leaves this plane of existence for a few moments at a time. When he is tempted to end his problems by pushing Beauregard into a vat making soap, Burnbridge’s devilish alter-ego appears on his shoulder to encourage him in the evil task.

Flame O’Neill is expertly performed by Celeste Holm, who offers a wicked little giggle when her ill charge is trying to sleep. She is the perfect temptation for Beauregard, but he does eventually cause her to have “Bottomley” trouble.

Gwenn Bottomley, the piano-teaching sister of Beauregard, is enchantingly portrayed by the gorgeous Barbara Britton, who may be best remembered for her twelve years as a Revlon Girl and for bringing Pamela North to TV in Mr. & Mrs. North.

Art Linkletter, who died this May at the age of 97, was quite good as the host of “Masquerade for Money” Happy Hogan.

The role of Frosty, the shapely neighbor who is ogled by all the men except Beauregard, was convincingly acted by Ellye Marshall, whose resume only includes five films.

Mel Blanc lent his remarkable voice to Caesar, the parrot.

Director Richard Whorf had a very successful career directing on TV including several episodes of Have Gun - Will Travel, Gunsmoke, My Three Sons, and The Beverly Hillbillies.

Champage for Caesar is available on DVD. Let the bubbles begin!

12 Days of Christmas: Come to the Stable

In the opening minutes we watch two French nuns in black habits walking over hills cloaked in pristine white snow when they see a sign post that shows the directions to Jordan, Galilee, Nazareth, and Bethlehem. The sisters walk towards Bethlehem and hear a lovely voice singing in Latin, “Oh Come All Ye Faithful.” They Come to the Stable and see a living nativity, complete with singing and flying angels. When the camera moves back, we realize that this scene is being captured on the canvas of artist Amelia Potts, as endearingly portrayed by Elsa Lanchester. Before Miss Potts realizes it, Sisters Margaret and Scholastica have taken up residence with her. These are nuns on a mission to fulfill a promise made to God to build a hospital in America after World War II.

Loretta Young and Celeste Holm are radiant as sisters of the Order of Holy Endeavor. They have to work with three men who each provide obstacles to their purpose: a composer and neighbor, Robert Mason (Hugh Marlowe), a Bishop (Basil Ruysdael) with no money to assist them and the power to stop their effort, and a wealthy “bookie” in New York named Luigi Rossi (Thomas Gomez) who owns the land on which they want to build.

The screenplay was written in 1949 by Clare Boothe Luce and was quite different from her previous works, including The Women. In 1944, Luce’s only child, Ann, died at the age of 19 in an automobile accident. Part of Luce’s healing from this tragedy included her conversion to Roman Catholicism. Come to the Stable was her first written work after these events.

There is a charming quality to this film that is reflected in unlikely happenstances and the luminescent countenances of Loretta Young and Celeste Holm. Dooley Wilson is delightful as Anthony James, an employee of Mason who, along with Miss Potts, provides consistent support for the sisters, despite the challenges they encounter.

Interesting note: The four areas named on the sign post exist in Israel. Pennsylvania appears to have all four areas although Jordan is a township. The box containing my videotape copy of the movie identifies the location as Bethlehem, Connecticut. There are, however, several dozen cities by that name in the U.S. The location would seem to need to be in close proximity to New York because the nuns travel there in a jeep that is open at the top.