Sunday, December 6, 2009

This Week's Poll: Which private investigator would you hire to clear yourself of a potential murder rap?

The scenario:  You and your business partner run a highly successful telecommunications empire...but he has been found murdered! There are suspects aplenty:  his embittered ex-wife; the powerful union leader; the disgruntled former employee; and many others. However, no one has a better motive than you. Your personal finances have been a little questionable lately and you just inherited the other half of the company. The police have made you the prime suspect!  And what's more, you don't have an alibi. It's time to hire a private invesigator who can find the real culprit and get you off the hook. Which of the following would you hire?  


Sam Spade (Humphrey Bogart, The Maltese Falcon) - Cynical detective who "doesn't mind a reasonable amount of trouble." He knows something about having a partner who gets murdered, which could be a plus--or not. Specializes in recovery of black bird statues.



John Shaft (Richard Roundtree, Shaft) - Hip, cool detective who seems to know everybody in the big city. Prone to a bit of violence, but also very smart.  Indeed, "he's a complicated man, but no one understands him but his woman...Shaft!" Can you dig it?



Thomas Magnum (Tom Selleck, Magnum, P.I.) - Former Navy SEAL with plenty of style and access to unlimited resources. Drives cool sports cars. Handsome and charming, which might inspire lady suspects to offer valuable information. Be sure not to call him a "private investigator"--he doesn't like slang terms like "P.I." and "private eye."



Honey West (Anne Francis, Honey West) - Glamorous private eye who looks good in animal prints and drives a Cobra convertible. Knows martial arts, so she can dispatch any troublesome henchmen. Her sidekick Sam makes it a two-for-one deal, but Honey is the one you're hiring. Only downside: Minimal experience...her TV series only lasted for one season.



Mike Hammer  (Ralph Meeker, Kiss Me Deadly) - Sometimes brutal private eye who's willing to use his fists as well as his brain. A cynical loner, he's the kind of guy that's going to stick with your case no matter what happens. On the downside, he's liable to get arrested so he can cool off.


Jim Rockford (James Garner, The Rockford Files) - At $200 plus expenses, he's a pretty economical choice. Plus, as a former convict, Rockford has his share of contacts..and he's friends with a police sergeant in the LAPD. His father sometimes helps out (at no extra charge).

Six fine choices, so who are you gonna call?  Cast your vote in the poll in the green sidebar!

13 comments:

  1. Ok, so Sam Spade would be the most likely to go down & dirty, get the bottom of the situation, twist a few arms, crack a few heads, piss off the police but you know Honey would be a much more pleasant hiree & certainly easy on the eyes compared to Spade who just might slap you around even though you hired him! Whereas Honey...well did I mention the eye candy?

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  2. Sam Spade, without a doubt. I wonder if we broke it down, if the males mainly go for hot Honey West and no females vote for her. Interesting thought.

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  3. Becky, I naturally think of Honey solely as an excellent private investigator. I didn't even notice Honey was female until you mentioned it...but I now see that she is.

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  4. Becks, just to "bust " your concept I did not vote for Honey.Wow, what a sexist remark LOL

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  5. Rick, I believe you....NOT! Paul, your "bust" of my comment was great!

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  6. This is very challenging. Depending on where the scenario was set, I would choose one person over another. I am still up in the air (in a hot air balloon with the Wizard) and will have to vote later in the week. I think it is a great, and thought-provoking, idea for a poll, Rick!

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  7. I voted for the coolest cat listed. I'm talkin' 'bout Shaft... Shaft!

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  8. If you're talkin' 'bout Shaft... then I can dig it!

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  9. I voted for Thomas Magnum. He is so handsome..
    ((sigh))

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  10. Honey West all the way!! And she still looks great....

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